Solicitors = Evil.

[Llama8 8]

I hate solicitors.

Not all solicitors (my brother-in-law's one & he's nice, but my mother-in-law's also one, but the less said about her the better), just the one that our buyer's are using to buy our house (for those that don't know, my wife & I are trying to sell our house & move from Chav-central to somewhere a bit more "cultured" where the average age of a grandmother is higher than their shoe size).

 

Anyway, where was I in my rant...

 

Yes, our buyer's solicitor.

When our sale started getting places, our buyer said that he wanted to exchange (contracts, when it's legally binding in the UK, this can be at any point between the offer being accepted & the date of completion when you actually move house, depending how many surveys, questions, etc there are) asap & then actually move on the 31st of this month (presumably 'cause this is when his lease on his current rented house/flat runs out). This is fair enough, given my wife's pregnant, that's fine by us.

 

So we're (me & wife) all happily going about our daily lives answering several lots of truely stupid questions from our buyers solicitor (to "prove" that he's doing something & therefore should be paid), then I think that he's either in a (serious) car crash or has a stroke or something (two bad things happen to their soliticor at some point. I think this is time-reversed Karma), so there's further delay where our buyer gets another solicitor, more stupid questions, more delay.

 

Come last week (Tuesday to be precise), we get told that the bods we're buying from have a dependant purchase going on (ie they are buying somewhere), so we wig out & start getting a tad stressed about whether or not we're going to have somewhere to bring up our baby (due in June) or not, or if we're going to be moving into rented, or what. So we put pressure on the people we're buying from & try to find out what's happening, more stress, more waiting, we eventually force them into being ready to exchange on Friday (17th March), only to find out that our buyer's solicitor doesn't have our buyer's deposit cleared in his acoBLEEP! (so he's not ready to exchange). So fine, we'll settle for exchanging on Monday (today).

 

Turns out that our buyer's solicitor's not in the office (basically what happens is that the solicitor at the bottom of the chain phones the solicitor above him & says "are you ready to exchange contracts? 'Cause we are", this happens all the way up the chain till you get to the "top" person (who's not buying anywhere), then they all tell the solicitor "below" them that yes, they are ready to exchange. Then something happens & everyone's exchanged & then you all sit in legally bound goodness until the Day of Completion, when money & keys are exchanged & you actually move).

And there isn't anyone in their office (or they can't be arsed to read through the files) who can say "yes, we're good to exchange", nor can they apparently phone said solicitor (who's probably on a course) for a verbal confirmation, nor has said solicitor left a message to tell anyone that yes, they are good to go.

They are, apparently, slightly annoyed that someone else has had the temerity to call them on their generally lacsidasical attitude to conveyancing/work, that would make a Victorian Era fat cat factory owner proud. Nor, it would seem, do they actually want to a)do any work, or b)buy a house for their client. And they have the audacity to leave a message for our solicitor then refuse to take/reply to his calls, thus allowing them to say that it's "our" fault that they've not exchanged (don't forget, they sent several very pointless groups of questions to us to take up some time).

 

And we had a call from the people we're buying from telling us that "we were supposed to exchange today" & generally giving us grief 'cause we put them under pressure last week (what goes around comes around & all that).

 

So. Here we are ~1-2 working days after we were supposed to have exchanged waiting for some useless solicitors. And you know what's going to happen tomorrow? Our buyer's going to be ready, but the people above us are going to kick back & say they aren't. I know it.

 

PS. This is the second time we've tried to sell our house, the chain fell through last time.

 

Thanks for reading, I've left out a load of #### that happened earlier 'cause I just can't be arsed.

 

And thanks for all the nice thoughts you guys are going to send me & my wife, but please don't way "these things happen for a reason". That kind of concept isn't really in my worldview/philosphical outlook & would get me a bit miffed at the best of times, which these aren't (but I know that you mean well, which does matter, please believe that :hugz:).

And if you do want to help, please send some special forces (SAS, etc).

[erialc 2]

Llama ofc I'll send you and your wife good wishes and I'll I'll try not to annoy by saying anything except.... the boys on their way.....

 

:thor: :sw: :rambo: :shuriken: :hell: and a whole army of evil spiders

 

Watch out solicitors!

 

P.s and under those circumstances you rant was very very restrained and polite! Respect to you for that Llama

[Schot 407]

Boy Oh boy Llama. Sounds like a real disaster. But you know. These things hap...

 

Llama= :argh:

 

Schot=

 

...ummmm, where was I? Oh yah. These things happen one more time and I'll come and beat the lot of those soliciters up. Yah! Me and erialcs army! Good for nothing buggers.

 

Man, sounds awefully complicated to sell/buy a house sheesh. I'm stayin right here in my apartment.

 

Have courage Llama. And maybe a few drinks too. Extra karma credits are on their way in the mail.

[Llama8 8]

@ Schott...

 

Are those Karma credits good against genetically engineered genital Nit plagues?

 

 

And we've (finally) exchanged today. So we're good to move on the 31st.

 

Well, if someone breaks the chain now, they have to pay 10% of the value of the property, so at least we'd be compensated...

[erialc 2]

Yayyy Llama congratz on the exchanging of contracts ....looks like the boys gave em a good kicking and made em an offer they couldn't understand;)

[Guest gogoblender]

wow, llama I just saw this post. What a story! Ahhh, the solicitor tribulations. That deep and dark well is never dry and forever endless. Llama I can't believe how much red tape there is with this purchase...yeeowch!

But...

I'm so happy your purchase seems to be going through with at least some guarantee of monies down on paper as a "costs of suffering" pay off.

Looks like things are looking up for the new baby llama and if any of those guys dare to give you any more trouble just have them attempt to read in the course of one night and in one straight-through sitting some of my incredibly imaginative, oh-so-paiinful-to-read, but oh-so-cute () gogo-spelled words...

That'll do em in...

I promise

 

 

gogo

 

p.s. of course, does the geneva conventions prevent such infliction of pure horror?

[Llama8 8]

p.s. of course, does the geneva conventions prevent such infliction of pure horror?

No Gogo, no it doesn't...

 

 

And thanks guys...

[Aurora 2]

Hey Llama

 

Glad to hear the exchange has happened...

 

Hope it all goes well for you from here

[OuttaTown 0]

/viking /viking hope everything has worked out by now /guns /mad